The Tragedy About Most Nigerian Marriages Today is that girls date the love of their lives but end up marrying someone else. I would really like us to take a moment to analyze the Nigerian girlfriend.
Just take a look at this scenario, Boy meets girl and they fall in love. He dreams of a happily ever after with her, He is sure in his heart that he is going to end up with the girl. But the girl does not see it the same way. Don't get me wrong, she loves him. But only as a boyfriend not as husband material. ( Honestly, I am still trying to figure out how that works ).
She is not interested in building with him or helping him become her husband. She wants an ' already made product '. So she keeps thinking to herself;
"Where is this relationship taking us self?"
"He is almost the same age as I am."
"When is he going to make money?"
"When will he decide to settle down?"
"When will he be ready to propose before he will now come to pay my bride price?"
"Will I not get old in my father's house before then?"
Such are the thoughts that plague her subconscious in the dead of night. ( Because marriage is her number one priority in this life over everything else ).
Soon, she gives in to the pressure she has created for herself in her own mind and breaks up with her boyfriend. In less than three months, she is engaged to an ' already made man '. One who has made enough money to wife her. Boyfriend is devastated. But the real question here is, ' where did this new man come from? '. Three months seems like an awfully short period of time to know a man before accepting a ring from him. The truth is, he didn't just materialize out of thin air. He has always been there. But she had never really paid much attention to him nor did she get rid of him. She kept him around as a backup plan. In fact, she kept several backup plans, if I may say.
Nigerian girlfriends often than not, keep multiple side ccoks stashed away somewhere in case their boyfriends don't meet their required validity period. This event has a huge psychological impact on the boyfriend. He will probably never trust another girl ever again in his life. Thus, a serial cheat and fcuk boy is created. Hence, an unfaithful spouse. But he is not our focus for today.
Back to the girlfriend, so she ends up marrying this new guy, a considerably older man than the boyfriend, but the chemistry here is different. Maybe because of the age difference who knows. It is not the buddy buddy, best friend and lover lover kind of relationship she had with her boyfriend anymore. That is the kind where she was free to be free, naughty and wild to truly be herself. This one is more like an older brother and younger sister kind of relationship, sometimes uncle and niece, or in some extreme cases, father and daughter. Such rigidity, no fun, no romance, no friendship, just papa, and mama, she would never dare fart in his presence lol hehehehe.
They probably never really got to know each other well before tying the knot. She left the guy she vibes with, the one who knew everything about her and truly understood her for a total stranger all in the name of marriage, and in an interesting plot twist, she actually expects to keep up this charade for the rest of her life and hopes to god that it works out.
Then it does not. And she begins to watch War Room back to back and run from one prayer house to another. This is the classic origin story of many Nigerian marriages today. It is no longer about love, romance, friendship, companionship and compatibility. It is just about getting married for the sake of it. Having a glam wedding, Because apparently everyone else is doing it. I mean this is what society expects of them right, so why the hell not?
Credit: Eze Drizzy Jude
Credit: Eze Drizzy Jude
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